My emotions are ganging up on me tonight. :\
I was talking to my best online friend tonight on IM. And all of a sudden it hit me.
I want to be with Alex right now. Yet I can't be for whatever reason. I want whatever is going on between us to end right now. I want him back the way I had him last year. Not a sexual way mind you.
I'm really really down right now. All that is going to turn into anger soon. Oh, and it doesn't help that he still hasn't answered my text message (see last post). It's been 3 days so he isn't going to respond.
I don't know how much longer I can take it before I snap. :\
I wish I could just fix it......
grrrr
Typing this isn't helping very much. I'm going for a walk.
Well, I just came back from my short walk and I feel better......for now.
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Music from Casino Royale
6 comments:
It's really unfortunate that you can't make Alex's problem with you end. It must hurt terribly. Since you can't control his feelings, all you can do is give him space, and hope his attitude will change.
I wish there were some way I could help. Just know that I care.
*hugs*
Sorry buddy. -_-
*hugs*
Peter
sorry to hear and a part of you may always want alex. It is just something we have to live with
bob
I know the feeling and I know it hurts like Hell. Unfortunately, there's nothing you can do to force the situation. I wish I could say something more encouraging but I don't want to raise false hopes.
Hang in there! Alex is not the only boy in the world, just the only one upon whom you're fixated.
Even if this comment doesn't sound too cheery, I truly wish only the best for you.
best friend ^_^
at least you discovered the most important thing about being online - which is getting offline and going to find a place where you can clear your mind and not sit there staring at the screen waiting for something to happen
your feelings for Alex will change and evolve over time - just remember that whatever happens they will never go away - and it's your challenge to find a way to take those feelings and turn them into something positive in your life - someone, someday will help you with that - it might even be Alex himself
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