Dentists, Baseball Games, and Automobiles

Yesterday was a really busy day!

In the morning, I had to go to the dentist to get my first cavity since I was a kid filled, and also an area that is hard for me to get to had to be protected. Why is it hard for me to get to? It's a long story actually haha.

In addition to all that I also had to get a panoramic X-Ray done to see where my wisdom teeth are. The two bottom ones will definitely have to come out sometime. They're coming in horizontally :S

Of course they had to numb me up before they did anything. That lasted a few hours. It felt like my lip was fat >__>

So after the numbness went away (right after I ate something), my brother called. He asked if I wanted to go to the Pittsburgh Pirates baseball game. Of course I did! They're boring to watch on TV but really fun when you're there!

So here are some pictures I took with my cell phone's camera. Some are kinda bad quality :\


I-79



When going to Pittsburgh via I-79, you make a turn and this is what you see




Walking across the Roberto Clemente Bridge





From our seats up in the nosebleed section lol






Everytime I go down to a Pirates game they win. Last night was no different :D



Final view of the stadium


We had a great time!


Now today, I woke up at 8:30 and had to go to the bathroom (TMI?). Dad asked if I wanted to get dressed so we can go car shopping. I said I just wanted to go back to sleep. So he went by himself. Then he called me around 11:30 and told me to get up and get dressed. He's on his way back here right now so we can go back up to the car dealership to get MY car. MY car is actually his old car :P

This has been a great week!

Everyone's Happy

Okay, so....

Dad and I went up to the school this morning before the buses got there. The guidance counselor was in a meeting, so we had to wait. Once she got back, she had us go back to her office. She said that she didn't receive any of the transcripts that were resent to her.

*rolls eyes*

I'm not even gonna get into who's fault I think it was that she didn't get them...

Anyway, she then told us that they have their own cyber school program. Mom and I were told this last month when we meet with them for the first time, but I had completely forgotten about it. Here's how it's going to work:

I'm still considered a junior credit-wise, and I need 10.5 credits to make graduation this year. That means I have to take 10 and a half classes, 11 classes at most. That's a few more than a normal student would take in a year, but I have to do it if I want to make graduation this year like I'm supposed to; so that's a big motivation to do well right there.

We signed the registration papers while we were there and met with the Online Learning Coordinator (OLC), who we knew from my brothers' days in that school. She said that it'd take about 2 days to get me going on it, and we'd have to go up again so she can show us how it all works and whatnot.

She also said that I'd have to go up to the high school one day a week for 2 hours. I'm not totally sure what that's for, but I assume you get extra help there if you need it or something. Also, I get to have actual textbooks this time; with the other cyber school it was all online, so I basically got tired of being on the computer all day long. She also said that I'm free to take part in any clubs/sports that I want to. I'm thinking about at least being on the yearbook staff because Mom is in charge of that this year. Maybe also take part in Key Club, which a girl on Facebook who I knew before said I should join. There may be other clubs I'd be interested in; we'll see.

I'm happy with this decision. I like that the teachers are right there and you can go get help whenever you want. With the other cyber school, the teachers were spread all over Pennsylvania. Dad's happy with this decision too, and I'm sure Mom will be when she hears.

So, everyone is happy.

:)


Right now, Dad and I are going to go to town to see a lady from the church who is in the hospital, go to Wal-Mart to look at printers, then get some lunch and back home.

See ya later!

P.S. Don't forget to check out my twitter for updates from me, and follow me if you want :)

Slightly Modified Plan, Comments, College.

Okay, so here is the new plan for tomorrow:

Dad takes me up to school, hopefully ahead of the buses, and we go into the office. There we'll find out if anything has changed. If not, then we'll withdraw me right then and there, go home and contact the cyber school. If things have changed, then I assume we'll work on a new schedule of classes.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Now, let me take this time to respond to a few comments on the last post.

@ Bob:

I think I told you this when we were talking the other day, but I'll put it on here for everyone else to see too. Yes, I can enroll in the cyber school. It's just like a regular public school; you can enroll anytime, and there are no requirements to enter.

@ NG:

I don't want the attempt to get me back into this school to fail. I was actually getting excited about it before we had the first meeting with the guidance counselor last week. We all agree, even you said it I think, that it is dumb to enroll me as a junior in one school while I'm already a senior in another.

@ NG, Torchy!, Steevo:

I don't get how I'm supposed to fight this, assuming they still don't have that transcript tomorrow. I mean, if they don't have it then they don't have it. Fighting it now would just be a waste of time and an interruption to my education.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Okay, now on to college, or uni as the foreigners say.... I think.... Oh forget it, I'll just say post-secondary education :p

I keep floating back and forth between interests, and it's time to decide. Here are three main the interests I keep floating between:

1. Ship's officer (also called mate).
2. Naval architect.
3. Architectural drafter.

Currently, I'm back at interest No. 1.

I requested more information from The Great Lakes Maritime Academy a few days ago. This is probably where I'll go if I choose to do this career. If you are interested, I'd be doing the Deck Officer Program. Also, if you're interested, watch this video.

Here are classes I'd be taking, and their descriptions.


I'm all excited about that ^ now, but let's see if I get through high school first :p

A Plan, Finally!!

So I talked to Mom and Dad today about all this, not both together, and we've finally got a plan!

First of all, Mom says she'll support me in any decision I make, but it's Dad's responsibility to take care of it all. So here's the plan:

I go up to the school Monday morning, and after I get my schedule I go straight to the office. There I ask to see the guidance counselor to find out if anything has changed since my old B&M school resent the transcripts. Actually, if anything had changed then I shouldn't even have to ask, she should just track me down and find me. Anyway, if anything had changed then we would discuss a new schedule. If nothing has changed, then I'm going to tell them that I'll withdraw tomorrow (Tuesday).

Also, Monday morning, Dad is going to get in touch with the cyber school and see how many credits they say I have, and also talk about the possibility of re-enrolling there.

So, yeah, that's it.

Today is the Day

Yep, today we're going to find out what school I'm going to be going to. It's either a) the local school district if they're going to accept that I'm a senior, or B) back to the cyber school where they already know I'm a senior.

I talked to Mom on the phone last night. She said she emailed my old B&M school (brick-and-mortar) about the transcripts but she didn't hear anything back. So, she said was going to call them after she got done talking to me and leave a message explaining what she wanted, then call them again this morning and, hopefully, talk to the lady in person. Whether she has done that yet or not, I have no idea because she has her cell phone turned off during school, and I have no idea what her number is there.

I don't know how I'm going to convince Mom about me doing cyber school again (if nothing happens with that transcript). But, really, I think going there and being a senior like I should be is better than going to the local school and being a junior (again) just because of a technicality.

Okay, yes, I didn't do so well last year in cyber school. I let procrastination get the better of me (and also blogging :-S), but this has been a big wake up call! I don't want to have to go through this again! So if anyone thinks I'll mess up again two years in a row is crazy. Dad even takes some responsibility because he wasn't watching over me as well as he should have. So even he's had a wake up call.

So, I'm positive I can do it this year... I've got to do well this year... It's my last year before going off to college...

Ugh

The Future.... how scary... That'll be another post later on today maybe.

Grade Troubles.

Oh
My
Fucking
God...

What a day this has been!

Dad and I went up to the school to get me scheduled for me senior (12th grade) year. We got put into the conference room, and waited for the guidance counselor. She was out in the office talking when i heard her say, "... no, he will be in 11th grade." I didn't know she was talking about me at the time. Then she came in and said, "Okay, we are here today to get you scheduled for your junior year (11th)." Thinking she just made a mistake and got me mixed up with whoever she was talking about earlier I said, "I'll be a senior." She said, "Oh, no. You're not honey."

Then it just went downhill from there... We ended up making two trips to the school, but neither resolved the issue:

You need to have at least 18 credits to be a senior (12th grade). According to all the transcripts that she got from my previous schools, I only have 13.5; that makes me a junior (11th grade). Now here is where the weird part is; I got a paper from the cyber school people when we were trying to decide on summer school. This paper has every credit I earned in my high school career. This paper totals the credits as 18.5. So according to the cyber school, I'm a senior (which they told me at the end of last year); but according to my new school, I'm only a junior.

The problem lies with my previous brick-and-mortar school (the school i went to before doing cyber). Apparently, and the guidance lady said this too, they didn't send the transcript that has the credits I got from there the same year I moved back here and started cyber school. I checked it against the paper that has all my credits on it and found that that missing transcript is indeed the problem. If we had that transcript then I would have 5 additional credits, and if I had those 5 credits then my total credits will equal 18.5; just like this one piece of paper says.

However, the guidance lady cannot go by what this paper says because it's not an official transcript. But when she saw it she realized what the problem was too, but she can't do anything unless she gets that missing transcript.

So, officially, I am a senior; which is where I should be. But since there is that missing transcript, she has no choice but to keep me as a junior.

Now, here is a scenario: Bob passes 11th grade with flying colors. However, while making his schedule for the next year, the guidance counselor accidentally throws a transcript of his away, which then forces him to lose X number of credits, preventing him to move on to the next grade level; forcing him to repeat a year he's already taken and passed.

That, essentially, is what's happening here.

BUT

If I do cyber school again, I'll be a senior. If I go to the local school district, I'll only be a junior because of a misplaced transcript...

Which would you choose?

Wasting a whole year of your life doing something you've already done?

Or

Moving on and completing school and get on with your life?


OH! That probably raises a question. What if I do repeat a year, and therefore take classes I already had? Which grade would be looked at by a college? Well, both, but according to the guidance counselor, they only consider the FIRST grade unless you failed the first time. So, that really isn't going to be better.


::EDIT::
I just looked over my grades for the bazillionth time today. Now I'm getting that my total credits minus the missing ones should be 15, not 13.5. Also, if it is 15, then my total credits should be 19.5 instead of 18.5 like that paper says. Of course, that throws everything else off too...

So I've concluded that if that transcript does come in, but if there is still a problem with me being a Senior, then I'm going to have her give me the transcripts and go thru each and every one with her until we get to the bottom of this. If there is still a problem then it should only be by .5 credits. Idk if she'll argue over .5 credits or not, but if she does then I'm doing cyber school again regardless if Mom says so or not; frankly, it's not really her decision. I think it should be mine, plus I don't even live with her. She has a awful habit of making up my mind for me... But that's another post.


Fuck, my head really hurts today.

Last Night.

As you can tell from the last post, I was stewing over the idea of whether or not to go through with camping last night. I don't know why, but after dinner I just didn't have the ambition to do it, not to mention not really being that excited about it.

But, I was talking to Courage around 7 p.m. last night and he kinda convinced me to do it. So I went up to ask Dad if he wanted to put the tent up. He was working on stuff, so I went back down to talk online some more. Just then Alex sent me a text saying, "Did you put the tent up yet?" which of course I hadn't. I sent back, "Dad and I will do it eventually... keep your pants on." As you can tell, I was still not too ambitious about it all. Alex sends back, "Oh (or maybe it was 'ok')... I'm just bored so I thought I'd come and help."

Dad said that I could go out and start putting up the tent and he'd be along shortly. So I sent Alex a message telling him that I was going to get the tent started. Not even a minute later he sent back, "I'm here." lol. He must have been floating around outside.

The tent goes up. Alex stays an hour, then goes and gets changed. Play around on my computer for awhile: Texas Hold 'em, Facebook, trying to get him to talk to Courage online (which he wouldn't lol). Then he went on Jackinworld.com to "look for something to entertain" me. His words, except the "me" is me, not him... supposedly... :p

Then, it's like 11:30, he asks me about these two sites, porntube.com and youporn.com, I guess he wanted to know if they were real sites. I didn't know, so he typed them in :O Yep, they are real; straight porn mostly I think. So then he says, "Know any better sites?" :O I don't really want to go to a gay porn site with him around. I don't know why, but it's just embarrassing :\ So I type in xtube.com, which really isn't that good of a site, but it has both straight and gay porn on it. He selected the straight part of the site. He watched a couple vids. Ick, straight porn.... gag me with a spoon. But he didn't touch himself or anything while he was watching... Isn't that what you're supposed to do?

I guess he got bored with the porn cos after two or three vids he gave the computer back to me. I didn't want to go to any of my usual sites, as I've already said. It'd be different if I knew he was gay, but I thought it might gross him out of something. So anyway, the computer got put away.

I'm under my cover and he's just laying beside me. I figured it was time to jack off, so I was trying to get a boner under the blanket. He says, "I thought you didn't like to do it under covers?" which I don't. Right then I realize that everytime we do this he always comments on how I start out trying to get a boner under the cover (I don't want to pull out my flaccid dick, just my hard one :p)... Then I decide to play with him (not "that" way :p). I still don't have a boner yet, but I make the motions, still under the cover, as if I do and I'm going at it lol. Again, he comments on me doing it under the covers, but I still act as if I'm going at it. Then I go under the cover completely; he's like, "What are you doing?"

I say, "What do you think?"

"I don't know." So now he's playing dumb. I think he's trying to get my to come out of from under the covers. Then I say, "Wow, it's really hot under here" lol. He says, "So take the cover off" if we were chatting online I'm sure he would have added a "ffs" to the end lol. I could tell he's getting really annoyed cos I'm doing it under the cover and not where he can see.... at least that's what I think.

Okay, so I think I've tortured him enough so I come out, and we jack off. Just like the last time, I had a hard time "going the all the way" (i.e. coming). I don't know what it is, but I kept going a bit soft even though I was going at it! Maybe I'm too used to porn :\ I comment on this when he asks (for the millionth time) if I'm close to coming yet. So he says, "Well, here's your video" and he rolls on his side so I can get a better view of his dick, but since there's not much light on him, it doesn't really help. Anyway, it ends up taking 45mins :O for us to finish. I guess he was waiting for me, but he ended first. That did it for me and I finished too. We cleaned up and went to sleep.


This morning, we were messing around on the computer again. Then we were just laying there, and he says, "Look what I found" and pulls out his hard dick :O Then five minutes later he says that he's gonna go home.

That's it.

Comments?

Thoughts?

Feelings?

Criticism?

etc...?

Well, Alex seemed more friendlier towards me in church this morning. As of late, it's not uncommon for either of us to really talk to each other in church. In other words, we barely say anything to each other, usually.

Today, he tapped me on the shoulder to get my attention about something, then later he tapped my knee to turn my attention to dead blades of grass that he was plucking from the bottom of his shoes o.O

Then I was drawing, as I sometimes do, on the back of the bulletin handout. Today, it was a weird bug and some UFOs lol. He looked at the strange looking bug and said, laughing, "What is wrong with you?" Then when I got up to leave at the end of church he said as I was folding up the bulletin, "You should be an artist." Not sure if he meant that seriously or not; I think he was joking.

Dad had a meeting after church with the Session, so I went home to tend to the dogs. When I walked back into the church to pick up Dad later, Alex said my name in a weird voice he occasionally does. It's like a high pitched voice... a "gay" voice if you will.

That was all that happened really.


Not much else to report today. My sister-in-law is here now with the niece. I really dislike babies so I'm sitting on the floor in the bathroom right now hiding out lol. I've been in here for a half hour now so I don't think my cover of an upset stomach is going to last much longer.


Oh, regarding the last post:

Personally, I'm torn between what I think I should do. On one hand I want to talk to him, but we all know I've wanted to do that before but always chickened out. On the other hand I want to do the sexual stuff cos, let's face it, it's fun doing it with someone else!

I will have my laptop in the tent with us, so be online tomorrow night (my time.), and I might let you say hi to him. He may "accidentally" stumble upon my blog too cos I have it favorited. Not to mention the porn :p

Okay, I guess I've got to go out and spend some time with family.... ugh...

3 Weeks?! :o

Dunno if you've noticed or not, but I haven't made a post having anything to do with Alex in exactly 10 days. I guess part of the reason is that he was on vacation for a week; having just got back today. Also Dad has been on "vacation" for two weeks now. He isn't away or anything, rather just on vacation from church stuff. Naturally, I haven't been to church since the 12th since Dad is on "vacation." I'll be back in church on the 9th.

So anywho, that adds up to 4 weeks of not seeing Alex. Well, I've seen him and he's seen me, but not in a social setting. 3 of those weeks (the last two and the next one) make three weeks of not talking to him in person or via text message (tho he did send two dumb forwarded emails to me before he went on vacation).

Of course I've thought about him, as usual, but I haven't really had much of a desire to do anything with him (non-sexual things anyway ;) ). For instance, today I was walking up the stairs to my room when I head my phone beep and vibrate on my desk signaling that I had gotten a text message. Get this, I actually thought, "I hope it's not Alex asking to do something."

:o

Whoa... did I actually think that? I didn't know that was possible... lol

It wasn't him.

Does this mean I'm actually starting to get over him?

:O

I wonder if he's noticed the silence between us? I guess we'll see what happens two Sundays from now when we see each other in church...

What do I post about now since I don't have much of anything to say regarding Alex? Maybe this blog will eventually go to Blog Heaven with the others that have been stopping their blogs recently. I just deleted yet another blog (Courage's) from my links list the other day. It seems like it's getting smaller by the day!

That's all for now,
Peter

P.S. Apparently Mikey and I can't be considered E-BFs now. I guess he just got his own in real life. Whoever this person is just seemed to pop up outta nowhere. One day there's no one, then the next day he's getting blowjobs from someone o_O Meh... whatever...

P.S. x2: I went to a different eye doctor today. As soon as he walked in the exam room my gaydar pinged! No, I wasn't attracted to him or anything, but I think he's gay! Seriously, he had this light facial hair and a soft voice bordering on being feminine. When he was talking to Dad i snuck a peek at his hands, and what didn't I see? A wedding ring! He just had the air of a gay person around him, if you will.

P.S. x3: I've been extremely horny the past two days. Maybe that's a side effect of these eye drops? Anyone want to participate in a circle jerk with me? :D

P.S. x4: I'm getting all these P.S.s whenever I go through my labels and see labels that remind me of something I want to say.

I'm on steroids! :o

Continuing from the last post...

Two days ago, I Googled "red eye and sinus pain" and got this good site that listed the different things that could be wrong up there (in my eye/sinuses). Most of them were allergies, which I have none of as far as I know. So Dad was thinking that I might had gotten an allergic reaction during the room change; possibly from the paint. But the thing that puzzled him was that it was only happening on the left side. You would think if it's an allergic reaction it would be on both sides, right?

So, thinking it was an allergic reaction from something in my new room, I made the decision that it would be best to sleep in the living room for a night to see if it indeed was something in my new room. We also decided that if nothing changed by Monday (today), we should go see a doctor.

After two nights of sleeping in the living room, the only thing that had changed was a pain in my back and neck from sleeping on the couch. So Dad called the family doctor to see what he should do. That doctor referred us to the Wal-Mart Vision Center, who is our regular eye doctor.

The ride over there was horrible. I couldn't open either of my eyes because of the sunlight [(consensual photophobia) (It's interesting that it says I spelled 'photophobia' wrong, but homophobia is on the list of correct spellings :\)], and towards the end I started to get that empty feeling in my stomach which usually means I could throw up soon (motion sickness). By the time we got to Wal-Mart (~30 minutes away), my left eye was watering like crazy, my nose was running, and my stomach felt empty (it actually was cos I hadn't eaten anything since the night before).

The lady who was at the counter in the Vision Center took one look at me and said, "Jeez... That looks awful."

"Yeah, it feels awful too," I said. She seated us and gave Dad a bunch of forms to fill out. A couple minutes later another nurse lady walked past. She glanced at us with a smile on her face. Once she saw my eye the smile quickly left. "Jesus, what happened to your eye?" she asked.

"That's what we're here to find out."

Finally the doctor took me back to the examination room. She did a medical history (asking me tons of questions), and did a basic exam. By basic exam I mean she had me look and read the eye chart, and had me follow her little light thingy.

After all the basic stuff, she dropped two yellow dye droplets in my eye, then looked at my eyes in the microscope. After shining many different colored lights in my eyes, she said she thought I might have Iritis. However, she didn't want to give me anything because she hadn't dealt with it enough to be sure. She ended up referring us to another eye clinic half an hour away. Then she explained what they may do to me and what they may give me as a medication. Before we left she washed my eye out. Thank God she did too, because that seemed to do the trick. I could finally open my eyes in the sunlight again, and the pain at the top of my eye was hardly there anymore. Btw, we were confusing that pain for sinus pain. It really wasn't in the sinuses, but in the top of my eye.

I had Dad get me a double cheeseburger from McDonald's before we left to go to the clinic. I was afraid of getting that ominous empty feeling in my stomach again. I ate most of it even though I really didn't have an appetite.

So anyway, the doctor at the eye clinic did basically the same thing the previous doctor did. He said I do have Iritis. In short, it's an inflammation of the iris. He gave me some eye drops which have prednisolone acetate in it. In other words, I'm taking steroids in eye drop form. I have to drop one droplet in my eye every hour. At night, I'll have to set my alarm for the middle of the night to put another drop in (that'll be fun...).

I have a follow-up appointment scheduled for Wednesday to see how the drops are helping.

I just had my 7th drop today and we can already see a difference in eye color. It's not so red anymore, nor does it hurt or water much.


Well, this is getting a bit on the long side so I'll stop here for now. I'll update you all after my appointment Wednesday.


P.S. Yes, I have deleted my Twitter account. It became too tedious to update it everytime something worth tweeting about happened.

P.S.S. Wow! 39 people who voted on the poll are Harry Potter fans vs. 7 who aren't :O

Pressure in My Head

Last week I started sneezing more than usual. That didn't really set off any alarms at the time. Then towards the end of the week, or the beginning of this week, I noticed that my left eye looked like I had gotten soap in it. By that I mean the eye ball was slightly red and more veins were showing than normal.

Then it started to hurt everytime I looked at light and also when I moved it in a certain direction. The best thing to do then is to get off the computer and away from the TV so the eye can "rest" right? Well, I didn't lol. I have an eyepatch that is used when you look through a telescope but you can't close your other eye. Anyway, I thought that would give my eye a "rest", and Dad agreed that it would be best to keep light away from it, while I continued to go about my usual routine.

Then the eye started to water more than usual. So Dad started looking for eye drops in the house, but we don't have any.

Then early this morning, it got to the worst point...

I woke up around 4 a.m. There was this intense pain at the top left of my left eye, like were the eyebrow ends. Everytime I opened either of my eyes and looked at something with light this spot started to hurt. Also, my nose was very stuffy. At this point it was obvious that it was a sinus problem.

My eyes were watering constantly at this point. Daylight was starting to pour into the room, so this made it difficult to open my eyes. Initially, I laid face down on my bed but this only worsened the pain/pressure in my head. So then I tried laying on my back, but this meant I couldn't open my eyes because of the light coming through the windows.

Finally Dad got up around 6. I told him to come into my room and close the blinds on the windows so I could at least open my eyes. By then it was like I was crying. My eyes wouldn't stop watering, my nose was stuffy and running... gah it felt horrible.

Finally around 6:30 I got up and went into the bathroom. Luckily I found some sinus reliever in the cabinet. I read the box to see what they are used for:

Sinus Headache
Sinus Pain & Pressure
Nasal Congestion
Sneezing
Itchy, Watery Eyes
Runny Nose

I had all of those except for the sneezing.

So I took two of the horse pills, and flopped back down on my bed. I woke up around 10. My nose was completely clear, my eyes were fine, no pain or pressure in my head. The pills had done their job.

My left eye is still a bit red. I just took two more pills because the "itchy, watery eyes" symptom was back. So we'll see what happens next.


Here are some pics I took today of my new room:


Hmm... It looks smaller on here, but it's bigger than my previous room. The pile on the lower left corner is pictures that have to be hung up.

I still haven't gotten stuff where it's supposed to be yet.


My bed. The eyepatch can be seen on the night stand.



Pile of Kleenexes on the floor :p

I want to paint the night stand a brownish color to match the other wood in the room. It's green cos it matched Dad's room when he was a kid.




My new desk set up. Most of the things on the desk haven't found a home yet. I'm still working on putting everything where it should be.



Casper. Lucky is the multi-colored cat in the other pics. =^_^=


Well, I think I'll get off the computer for awhile. I'm gonna go read some more of Harry Potter and The Chamber of Secrets.


P.S.

HAPPY B-DAY MIKEY!

P.S.S. I got a MINI Cooper!

Car

I want a Mini Cooper. There is one for sale nearish to hear for $9,200 (~$10,000 less than a new one). So I told Dad this, but he says that I have to have a job first before I can get a car. Then he adds, "... just like your brothers."

*rolls eyes*

Well, no one is hiring around here. The closest place that is hiring is a half hour away. So that means I need a car FIRST to get there.

I told him, "All my brother's had jobs in town, so they didn't need their own car. No one is hiring in town. The places that are hiring are all in C------, or G--------. So wouldn't it make sense to have a car first?"

Then I outlined a plan for me to pay him back everything out of my paychecks that I don't need for insurance and gas. I mean, I don't need money for anything else cos I don't do anything lol. After all, I'm not taking anyone on any dates anytime soon :p

Anyway, he said that I can have his current car for free (except for gas and insurance) once he gets a new car before the end of the year.

So... I guess I'll be driving a Ford Focus for awhile.


P.S. I found a 2000 Mercedes on Craigslist for $2,800. Dad just laughed :\

"I give up"

So we are painting today. Dad's just painting the high places and the corners/edges right now. I'm too sloppy to paint around the woodwork lol.

Dad originally said he wasn't going to help me paint because it was my own project that I came up with. Which is why I asked Alex if he wanted to help. But, of course, he didn't answer me... as usual...

-_-

So I have a message saved in my phone right now to him. I'm not sure if I should send it or not...

Basically I tell him that if he didn't want to help, or couldn't, then all he had to do was say so when I asked. I just told him that a few weeks ago too. So I said, "How many times do I have to say that?" I mean really, how hard is that? So then I go on to say that "I give up trying to get you to hang out with me." That's it.

That really needs to be said. If I tell him that then I really won't ask him if he wants to do something anymore, or at least only for stuff that needs to be done for the church or something. Whereas if I just tell myself that then I'll just forget about it in a few days and start asking again.

In other words, if I send him that message then the ball will start to roll to end the friendship... if you can even call it that. That's what I want now so I can save myself headaches in the future, and maybe I'll finally get off the emotional roller-coaster he's put me on (and one I've willingly rode for months now).

So what do you think?

Broadcasting Live From Inside the Tent

So... yeah...

I'm laying on the air mattress inside the tent right now.

I just got in the mood to go camping today. So... here I am!


First, let me backtrack a day...

Saturday, my brother and his wife along with their new baby showed up at our place. They visited for a little while and showed off the new addition to their family. Then they announced that they were going to come to church today O.O

Okay, that's all well and good I guess... Except you have a new born... Who cries...

She was actually quiet in church today however.

Right after church Alex ask if I wanted to take his recycling stuff for him. Okay, sure.

For lunch I was going to make so Hamburger Microwavable stuff for myself. I dumped the stuff out of the packets into a plastic bowl and set it in the microwave then set it for 7 minutes. My brother, wife, and baby stayed downstairs while Dad and I went up to change our clothes.

After about 5 minutes, my brother started yelling my name and told me to rush downstairs. I went down and the kitchen was full of smoke and the place smelled so bad!

I opened the microwave only to have a plume of greenish/yellow smoke gush out into my face. I covered my face and went to throw open all the windows. Brother, wife, and baby rushed upstairs, only to be driven back down and outside by the smoke/smell.

After most of the smoke cleared away, I saw that the macaroni in the bowl was all black, and the bottom of the bowl melted to the microwave tray!

My brother grabbed it and took it outside.

Meanwhile, I got fans in the windows to suck the air outside.

All the while though, my brother is laughing because I forgot to put the water in the stuff. Because he's laughing, I'm getting all upset and mad. He kept saying stuff about not adding the water then he asked me, "Pete! Did you forget to add the water?" So I said, "Will you shut up about it already?!?!"

"You made a mistake. Big deal! No need to get all upset about it."

"Maybe if you shut up about it I won't get all upset!"

He just walked away. I saw Dad was chuckling to himself about it all. Finally I started to find it funny and we all started joking about it afterwards.

It still smells in the kitchen lol

I guess you just had to be there.

Anyway, then I sent Alex a message asking when he wanted to take the recycling stuff. Go figure, he didn't answer. So after a few hours I sent one saying that I didn't have all day to wait around. I had stuff I had to do ffs!

He showed up 2 minutes later.

I had to run up to Mom's first tho to drop off some things. While we were up there I decided to take him to the haunted house. I can't really describe it. I'll take pics next time. Then we took a detour over to a bridge that has some graffiti on it. It's my last name only spelled differently so it's made into the word "shits", only with the other letters of my last name put in it. It's hard to understand unless you know what my last name is.

Finally we went to the recycling thing... only to find it was full...

-_-

During this time I never said anything about what I posted about a few days ago. I probably never will either...

Once we got back I got in the mood for camping.

I sent him a message saying that I was putting the tent up today and leaving it up 'til Wednesday. Then I told him to let me know if he wants to camp out any of those nights.

No word back yet, but I'm in here anyway.... alone...

:(

Oh well...

Btw, I hope to get back into using Twitter again. I haven't posted in awhile on there. I dunno if people even check for my updates.

July 4th

Happy Fourth of July to my fellow American friends.

Not much happening to day... or any other day for that matter.

I washed Dad's car, and trimmed/cut down some bushes by the side of the house. Other than that, I've done absolutely nothing. Well, except watch my new favorite show: Dexter. Mikey got me hooked on it lol.

Speaking of Mikey, I've been thinking of him so much that I haven't had time to think about Alex much at all.

I told Dad that we should go on vacation to where Mikey lives. He asked why and I said because I have an old classmate that lives out there lol. Somehow, I don't think I'll be going all the way to the West coast anytime soon. Sorry Mikey.

Oh and Mikey, by the time you read this I hope you aren't missing any limbs from messing with those fireworks :\

Great Time

Well, let's continue from the last post.

Alex got back from the bike trail, and helped his dad with the firewood stuff or whatever.

Then at 8:15 he sent me a txt saying that they were going out the get ice cream.

Between the time he left and the time he got back, Alex2 just randomly comes over and checks out the tent. I wasn't in it, but Dad was sitting on the porch and saw him there. So I was forced to sit and make small talk with him until Alex came back from the ice cream place. Alex2 again brought up the fact(?) that Alex and Joe are "way too close."

An hour and 15 minutes later (9:30), Alex finally got back home. It took us 15 more minutes just to get rid of Alex2.

After Alex2 left, Alex said, "Okay, let's go to the tent."

"Um, wait. What about the movie?"

"I don't really feel like watching it now."

Okay, he didn't want to watch the movie. No biggy. That just meant that we had more time in the tent :p

Once in the tent, the sexual stuff started happening almost instantly. I don't mean physical sexual stuff. Just the verbal stuff (ie him taking everything I say and spinning it into a sexual reference). We chatted for awhile until around midnight. I can't remember most of what was said or what we talked about. Throughout this time, he kept making small moves to instigate us masturbating together.

For example, he kept reminding me of things we used to say and do last year. Stuff which I can't say here because Matt just told me not to.

And, of course, he kept "readjusting" and "scratching" himself. As usual I asked if he wanted help. Most of the time he responded, "I'm good thanks."

Then at ~11:30 he asked, "So, is it almost time for your masturbation session yet?"

Well, that was the kickoff that started us wanking together. He wouldn't let me touch him, so no handjobs lol.

Okay, well, I'm not really sure if I should put in all the details or not. I've already done it when I described camping last year. So I guess I will now too. Plus it's fun to relive it :p

Anyway, to start off, I don't like to just pull it out in front of everyone when it's not hard lol. So I was underneath a heating blanket. So I'm tyring to get hard under the blanket when Alex asks, "I thought you didn't like doing it under a blanket?"

"No, I don't."

"Well here then, let me help you." Then he grabs the corner of the blanket and yanks if off me (just like he did last year).

Then a few minutes later he says, "It's really hot in here. I'm gonna take my pants and boxers off."

:O

OMG!

I could have cum right there!!!

We ended up having a race to see who could cum first. I won :p I'm pretty sure he let me win tho.

He kept asking me if I was close to finishing yet. When I'd say "no" he'd say, "Come on Peter, beat that meat!" and he'd repeat the "beat that meat" part a couple times. Things like that are the last thing that I'd expect to come from his mouth lol.

Anyway, like I said, I won :p Not by much though. He said (as it was dark I couldn't see) that he shot pretty far; all the way up to the top of his chest almost on his neck where he had his shirt pushed up to.

Okay, I've got to say it. I think Alex has the cutest dick I've ever seen lol.

So, after we did that we were both getting tired. It was already past midnight.

He fell asleep pretty quickly actually lol. But the neighbor's dog wouldn't shut up, so I didn't get to sleep so easily. Actually, while I'm waiting to fall asleep, I just lay there and watch Alex sleeping. Creepy?

At about ~2:30, Matt sent me a text asking what happened. I forgot to put my cell phone of vibrate, so it made the beeping sound that I have it set to make when I get a new text message. Surprisingly, this woke Alex up (he's a pretty heavy sleeper). He got up and said, "I have to pee. Should I walk to the edge of the hill and go?"

lol

Thinking that would be a bit dangerous for a person half asleep, I told him to just go on the other side of the boat. Then that made me have to go too lol. I guess we could have been more civilized and went inside, but it was 2:30 am and we were both half asleep.

Then when we got back in the tent, Alex said that he was cold now. I had been using the heating blanket the whole time. So I threw as much over his sleeping bag as I could without leaving me exposed lol. It wasn't working too well, so one of us had to move closer to the other so we could both get enough. I was the one to move because he was asleep already lol.

For the next 5 hours we slept less than a foot away from each other. I was sooo tempted to just throw my arms around him and cuddle with him, but I resisted the urge :p

I woke up at 6ish when the birds started singing. I couldn't do anything but lay there waiting for him to wake up. Finally he did at 9.

He asked if I was gonna masturbate again since he knows I usually do it before bed and after I wake up. I said that I could, and asked if he was again. He said he wasn't going to go the whole way, but that he would give me some visual aide :D

So, I used up two more tissues this morning. Between the two of us, I used 5 while he used 3. That's 8 less tissues I have to worry about now :p

I did ask him last night when he wants to camp out again. He just shrugged. And when he left he just said "See ya later."

So no more plans have been made to do anything as of yet.

So, what do you guys think?

I just feel like posting...

...so I am even though I've got nothing to talk about.

Oh, I almost ran over Alex... on purpose :p

He, Joe, and I think Alex2 (previously known as The Not So Annoying Friend) were out playing hockey in Alex's driveway. I had previously been up at Mom's working on school stuff, but I had come back ~20 minutes before to get a Spanish/English dictionary (which I couldn't find).

I was pulling out of the driveway when Alex, seeing me, purposefully skated out onto the road. As soon as I was on the road, I hit the accelerator. Hearing the engine rev, Alex quickly made his way back onto his driveway.

Don't worry, there was plenty of room for me to stop (I only made it up to ~35mph), so there was no danger of me actually running him over. Now if it were Joe on the road...

well, I won't go there >:)


Hmmm let's see.... what else?


OH!

I think Mom was on my laptop today.

:S

I was at her house trying to work on school stuff. I thought she wasn't gonna be there, but she was.

-_-

Anywho, I couldn't get much work done because all my computer wanted to do was install updates to everything!

It was installing a QuickTime update when I realized that I was gonna need my Spanish/English dictionary.

(Yes, this happened before the running over Alex incident)

So I left my computer on while I went down to Dad's. I told her it was on. When I came back up, the computer seemed to be in the same place and all. But...

The iTunes player was open (with a request to update of course)

and

The internet was open to the homepage (yahoo).

Well, I hadn't cleared my history and whatnot in awhile. So she could have easily accessed my blog, porn sites, email, and other sites I belong to.

:S

I didn't say anything, and neither did she.

So who knows if she actually was on it or not. I hope not cos if she was then she probably knows what's on this blog, and what porn I look at (i.e. GAY!!!).


Hmm... Not sure what else to post about.

Well, I'm pretty sure I'm gonna fail Spanish III. I hate Spanish. It's such a boring language. I hope I get to take German next year.


Speaking of next year...

Alex still hasn't mentioned the txt I accidentally sent him about going back to school in H'ville. H'ville is actually another city close to the one where I used to live, but they begin with the same letter so I know what I'm talking about at least.

Also, I told Mom that I selected "undecided" in the "Are you returning to {enter name of cyber school here} next year?" form.

I still haven't made my decision yet.


Wow, this post is really random. I'm really just posting things that are going on in my head.


My oldest brother, his wife, their new baby, the wife's mother and maybe her brother are coming in on Saturday. The babies getting baptized Sunday, then there's gonna be a lunch for them at the church that Mom is doing.

So I'll be pretty tied up with all that...

Apart from them, my other brothers will be there as well as their female counterparts. Also my grandmother will be there, and my godparents. Not sure if anyone else is gonna be there or not.

After hearing that Alex said, "So I guess I won't be sitting with you then?" Um... duh! Obviously not! I didn't say that tho :p

Okay, one more thought:

I want a boyfriend.

And don't tell me to go back to a 'normal' school to find him cos I won't. Besides, even if I did I'm only going to be there for a year before I go off to college anyway so...

Hmm...

I really want to go camping with Alex right now too. I really want to fool around with Alex again too :D

Oh, did I mention that the other night that subject came up?

When I told Alex I didn't really want to camp out again, and he said in a disappointing tone, "Why?"

Well, I said, "Um. Don't you remember why we camped out after the first time (we were only gonna do it once)?" Obviously I was hinting at us masturbating together. Well, he just got all quiet and didn't say anything so... I changed my mind about camping and that seemed to make him happy (not sure if it's because I changed my mind or if it's cos i changed the subject lol).

Okay, that's all I have to say for now.

Tell me what's on your mind now.

Thanks in advance for all your wonderful comments you all are going to leave now

:D


P.S. Alex watches Hanna Montana, iCarly, and other Nickelodeon shows when he's alone. He denies it even though I know he watches them. Now tell me, what 15 yo BOY watches those shows then lies about it? Nothing screams gay more than that! :p

Coming Out

Okay first of all; I know this will probably sound dumb, but here is a quote from Dan's blog:

"...it felt like we were boyfriends. We were together most of the night and we were joking and it felt really great. I felt like i could just go up and kiss him and everything would be cool. I didnt, but it felt like i could."

It'll probably sound really stupid for me to say, but that pretty much describes how I felt last night too :) (see last post)


Yeah, okay. Now that that's outta the way...

I was at Mom's today trying to work on school stuff. She was there so I didn't really get much done. Later, I turned on the TV and we watched Law & Order: Special Victims Unit. This particular episode dealt mainly with homosexuality.

There were a couple instances while watching it that I got really uncomfortable, thinking she was going to say something about me personally. For example: there was a bit about how some people think homosexuality is caused by an overbearing mother and a distant father. I got nervous at this line because, well, that's how it used to be with me.

Um... there was another part, but I can't remember.

After the show ended she said, "I don't think those people have a choice in the matter."

:O

Wow, I was actually shocked to hear that. I was getting ready to leave so the subject got changed (thank God).


Then at dinner, I told Dad about the episode. I quoted one line that I thought was funny:

::Detective Stabler is reading a hate mail letter sent to the gay victim::

'All queers will burn in the flames of hell,' so sayeth the Lord." Somehow I don't think that's a direct quote.

Dad said, "No, it's not a direct quote, but it's not too far off either."

-_-

Somehow, I'm not really surprised at that.

So if I had to choose which one of my parents to come out to, I think I'd be safer telling Mom.


Btw, the episode was very much in favor of gays.


Right now I'm anxiously awaiting nightfall so I can go over to Alex's... assuming he asks. He said we were going to sit out so...

Great Day

FFS MATT!!! STOP CHATTING WITH ME SO I CAN TYPE A POST!!!!

::1o Minutes Later::

(Sorry for any misspelled words or things like that. I'm gonna try to proofread, but I'm soo tired)

Oh ahem...

Well, today was awesome!

I just got back from Alex's a half hour ago (ie midnight). I was with him for 3 hours! That's a long time for me to be around him. So I guess I'll start at the beginning of the day.

Church (don't worry, no religious stuff):

I was playing pocket pull as usual. Actually, I've bypassed my pocket now and went straight for the meat :p (I don't actually make it obvious what I'm doing down there cos, well, I'm only really warming my hand up :) )

Anyway, Alex elbowed me and asked, "Why do you hate cats so much?" Obviously hinting at the "Every time you masturbate, God kills a kitten" thing. Can't remember what I said to that.


After Church:

Ate lunch, watched a movie, then had to go back up to the church for an open house thing.


Open House Thing:

It was Alex's grandparent's 50th wedding anniversary. They had a little shindig at the church. It was boring. Dad and I only stayed for a little bit.


After Open House Thing:

I went up to Mom's and worked on school stuff. I'm gonna do that all this week too with finals.


After Mom's:

I got home, two of my brothers and their female counterparts were there (wife and gf). I didn't eat dinner cos I wasnt really hungry. They left after awhile.


Yard Work and a Visitor:

I was bored, so I decided to cut the weeds by the side of the house. Then The Not So Annoying Friend actually came over! His name is also Alex, so just to minimize confusion, I'm just gonna call him The Not So Annoying Friend.


Suspicions:

I actually enjoyed talking to him for 45 minutes. He is only annoying when Joe is around him (previously known as The Annoying Friend).

It surprised me that we both had the same suspicions about Alex and Joe. Awhile back I just had a thought that if Alex is gay, then he is up to something with Joe. I'm pretty sure Joe is gay or bi. He stands so close to you; he's practically on top of you. He also touches you randomly, and inappropriately. He also put his arm around my shoulders a few times before... just randomly. Wacko

(btw, it turns out that The Not So Annoying Friend doesn't really like Joe.)

Not So Annoying Friend brought it up by saying, "Have you ever noticed that Alex and Joe are together a lot?"

"Yeah."

"I think they're up to 'something.'"

"Wow, I thought I was the only one who thought that."

"Well, it's pretty obvious that they always want to be around each other."

At this point we see Alex go out on his bike out the street in the direction of Joe's (his gma also lives out there too tho). Not So Annoying Friend said, "Oh, Alex is going out to get butt sex from Joe."

lol

Can't remember what happened next, but after 5 minutes Alex came back, and asked The Not So Annoying Friend if he wanted to play hockey.

Hockey:

They moved the hockey net right in front of my house. I was still sitting on the stoop, so I just watched.

After a little bit, The Not So Annoying Friend had to go eat (at 8:30pm. wtf?). So Alex and I were alone for a little bit. He asked, "Do you want to go inside later and play Driver 3 (video game)? We'll sit outside tomorrow, I just feel like playing video games tonight." Well, of course I wasn't going to object to anything he offered.

The Not So Annoying Friend came back out, and they played for a half hour more until Alex was getting tired of him and told him that we (Alex and I) were going inside. The Not So Annoying Friend isn't allowed inside of Alex's cos he's appearently grounded or something like that (not sure why he was out to begin with).


Basement:

Hmm...

Lots to talk about here, but I'll try to limit it.

Basically, Alex started twisting everything I said into something sexual (as usual). For example: He told me my hair was all messed up. I said, "Yeah, I don't feel any hard gell in it anymore." To this he just started cracking up. All because I said "hard."

There were other instances like this too.

Then we talked about camping. I said, "I don't know if I want to do that again this year." In a really disappointing tone he asked, "Why?" After hearing that disappointing "why?" I changed my mind. I guess he want to do it.

I can't really remember much right now (it's late). Oh, he kept saying "us" in reference to me and him. IDK, I've never noticed it before, but he kept saying it.

At midnight, I decided to leave. I earlier said, "I hope Dad doesn't lock me out."

Then going out Alex's door, he said, "If you're locked out; just send me a txt and you can come back over."

Hmm... tempting...

I thought for a minute about lying, and saying that the door was locked. But then I thought, how am I gonna get myself out of that lie in the morning?

So I decided against it. Good thing too cos Dad was still up. Something I wouldn't have known if I didn't go inside.

So, yeah. Today was a pretty good day.

And we've made plans to sit outside tomorrow night :D I wonder if we'll stay out until midnight. It's awfully nice out tonight. Shouda camped out tonight. It is b-e-a-u-tiful out.

Okay, that's enough from me tonight.

Good night all!

Need Help With a Problem.

Alright, here we go again.

Like I said in the edited version of the last post, Alex and I didn't sit out last night. He never said anything about it. In fact, I haven't heard from him since Monday.

It's just a little thing, but I've been hurt again. Even though I wasn't really expecting anything, I still got hurt. Like I said, it's just a little thing. But it's a little thing in a long list of other things that have hurt me. I guess that's why it hurts so much. I don't really know.

As usual, my head is swimming with thoughts right now about it all. Once again I'm thinking about just giving up on him totally. If I had a penny for everytime I've thought that, I would be a very rich person. Anyway, it's driving me crazy again. The only way to solve this problem is to eliminate the source. There are two ways to do that:

1. Kill him

2. Kill myself

3. Get away from him

Obviously I'm not going to choose number one or two lol.

I'm seriously thinking about going back to my old school. The problem with that is that I have to wake up at 4:45 every morning five days in a row. I don't know if I can do that or not. I slept for 12 hours after waking up at 4:45 yesterday. However, I think once I get into the habit of it I could probably do it.

Why do I have to wake up so early you ask?

Because Mom and I both really don't want to move again. We have moved 6 times since her and Dad got divorced 10 years ago.

I can still live with Dad, but that means living right across the street from Alex which doesn't really solve anything. Or I can move in with Mom. She's right up the hill so I will be away from Alex. I can still go to church, and also visit Dad.

I do miss my old friends. When I think about it, I can't believe how dumb I was from choosing Alex over all of them. Since I already know everyone there, I won't have to go through "the new kid" thing.

I don't know what I should do.

Sorry for always complaining when Alex does something like this. I'm sure you must think it's getting old by now. I'm thinking the same thing about this whole thing with me and Alex.

I'd appreciate any thoughts you have. I haven't made up my mind yet about what I want to do. Your suggestions are welcome.