So we are painting today. Dad's just painting the high places and the corners/edges right now. I'm too sloppy to paint around the woodwork lol.
Dad originally said he wasn't going to help me paint because it was my own project that I came up with. Which is why I asked Alex if he wanted to help. But, of course, he didn't answer me... as usual...
-_-
So I have a message saved in my phone right now to him. I'm not sure if I should send it or not...
Basically I tell him that if he didn't want to help, or couldn't, then all he had to do was say so when I asked. I just told him that a few weeks ago too. So I said, "How many times do I have to say that?" I mean really, how hard is that? So then I go on to say that "I give up trying to get you to hang out with me." That's it.
That really needs to be said. If I tell him that then I really won't ask him if he wants to do something anymore, or at least only for stuff that needs to be done for the church or something. Whereas if I just tell myself that then I'll just forget about it in a few days and start asking again.
In other words, if I send him that message then the ball will start to roll to end the friendship... if you can even call it that. That's what I want now so I can save myself headaches in the future, and maybe I'll finally get off the emotional roller-coaster he's put me on (and one I've willingly rode for months now).
So what do you think?
7 comments:
Mate,
You know in your head what youhave to do.
Im not going to tell you but in the end the perosn who has to come out of this feeling better is you.
Do wht it takes, short term pain can sometimes mean long term happiness. You know what to do!
THinkin of you mate
Tom
Tom says it all, and concisely (unusual for him!)
Tom's hit the nail on the head. we've said it a number of times before, i know it sucks and it's hard to come to terms with, but unfortunately, you just don't seem to be that high on Alex's agenda.
i think the time to move on is overdue and if sending that text or one like it is an enabler then maybe it would be a good thing.
however, despite what we all say here, it's your decision Peter. you have to weight up the pros and cons and come to your own conclusion.
i wish you luck whatever you decide and whatever the outcome
torchy!
My take is that I hate to see you burning bridges, and I hate to see you making a scene (even if it is via text message). you are really just beginning to realize that Alex is a lost cause, as far as an really close friendship goes.
You are the one who needs the message, not Alex. If the only way you can get the message is by sending it to him, then do it. But I think you've begun to get it anyway.
IOW, I think if you can just do as you say in the message, then you don't need to tell Alex. Just stop inviting him. And if he ever invites you to anything, accept if you feel like it; don't accept if you're not interested; but above all, don't expect it to lead to anything more.
Do what you have to.
Naturgesetz is right when he said the message should be sent to you and not Alex. Don't send anything. At long last, just let it go.
What ng & J said: don't send it and stop asking him to do stuff.
If, and only if, he eventually asks why you've stopped inviting him to do things, explain that you got tired of him never responding with a yes or a no. Don't tell him it's rude or immature; just say you figured he didn't really want to hang out.
I'm late to the party with my (potentially unnecessary) advice - but FWIW - I would let it drop - don't send anything. Just decide on your own and move on. He doesn't need to know. Basically exactly what HCI and ng and J said. This is about you and your own mental well being.
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